The dreaded exam......

I am super excited to face my next challenge.  The dreaded California Bar exam!  I am also terrified.  Last night at class, our professor handed out a letter to give to our friends and family and it freaked me out.  Here are a few pearls of wisdom the letter contained:

• Expect your loved one (that's me) to be "gone" for the next three months.  They may be right there beside you and not there; she will be thinking constantly about exam fact patterns while eating and showering.  Your loved one will dream about the bar.   (I am going to be really boring.  I can't even sing in the shower anymore?)
• The person you knew as a slightly crazed law student will be taken over by "Bar-it is."   (I don't even know what this means exactly, but I was more than a slightly crazed law student...does that mean I will be deemed certifiably insane by the time I take the Bar?)
• Your loved one is competing against thousands of other people- young people, just out of law school, many with little or no work or family commitments.  (I am screwed. (excuse my language)  I am old with many family commitments  Thanks for this!!)
• Expect your loved one to say "NO" to all social commitments.  Tell your friends not to even ask.  (Isn't this a bit extreme?  I mean I have to eat lunch and exercise can't I drag a friend along for a break?  I can even give her a few fact patterns during our run.....if I accidentally tripped you right now because I have fact patterns clouding my brain and you fall and break your leg am I negligent?)  
• Delay any important decisions, major changes, arguments until after the Bar.  (If I have done anything to tick you off, yell at me in three months please)
• Try not to take the moodiness and tension that sometimes comes with Bar stress personally.  (and if you do we'll argue about it in three months!)      

I am not sure how my classmates felt about this letter but it stressed me out more than the actual exam!! 

I will not be as easily accessible until August 2nd.  However, I am not going to hide in a cave until the exam.

I have friends and family I care about and they will hear from me even if it is a text once a week or to go on a run with me.  (promise I will NOT trip you)  This exam is the most important I have ever taken.  I am going to take it seriously, but I need a balance.  I need time with my family and friends or I will go insane!  I have three kiddies and a husband that may have a problem with me being "gone" until August.  

I understand the message behind the letter.  The Bar exam must come first.  That is going to be difficult because I have never put my family second.  I will make it up to them on August 3rd!  Until then, please send happy thoughts, prayers and understanding my way.  

Bittersweet...

It seems to be the word of the day for me.  Well, not exactly for me but for my daughter.  My mother always tells me that any pain, sadness, sorrow I feel....she feels too.  Boy oh boy do I understand that now.

Two weeks ago Gabrielle injured her knee in soccer.  It was the second game of State Cup.  Gabby and the goalie were racing towards the ball.  They arrived at the same time.  Gabby shot....the goalie blocked it and Gabby went down.  I saw the look on her face when it happened and I knew she was in pain.  However, I did not expect a ruptured ACL, torn Meniscus, torn muscle behind the knee and a sprained MCL.

See why I didn't think it was that bad?  All smiles!

The day after

Today her team has made it to the final four!  Gabby is with her teammates and friends all smiles, and I am in tears.  As I am writing this, Gabby sent me this text..."everyone on the team pitched in for a jacket, I am loved!"  Once again, I am reminded that our friends and family are amazing.  I have had friends that have stopped by just to give her a hug.  Friends stopping by to check on her and bring her flowers.  She has gotten cookies, cards, and tons of love.

Gabrielle has a long road ahead of her.  She is currently attending physical therapy three times a week.
They are preparing her knee for surgery.  The surgery will replace the ACL and fix the meniscus.  After surgery, she will have another 6 months of physical therapy.  She has continuous pain.  You wouldn't know it being around her.  She rarely complains about the pain, but I know it is there.

I know there are people dealing with far greater issues than a bum knee.  But for us right now, this is a big hurdle.  I am continuously in awe of her ability to handle the situation.  She still has her goofy sense of humor, and a positive attitude.  I am sad that she is not playing with her team today.  I am sad that she will miss her freshman year of sports.  I am sad that she is in pain and scared that she faces surgery.

I know that God has a plan for her. (a wise friend reminded me of this yesterday)  She will work hard over the next year and return stronger.  Hopefully, the next time she is chasing down the ball and sees the goalie coming......she will jump over her instead of take the shot!!!!

Best teammates ever!

 

A reminder

Life has been so busy lately I feel our family is becoming disconnected.  I hear the kids arguing more often and I am lacking patience.  Then I watch them shower their sister with homemade gifts and all the bad disappears.  I am in awe at how much love they have for one another.  We are big on homemade gifts in our house.  Andrew wrote all over a plastic storage bin filled it with candy and a book...voila the perfect birthday gift.

He wrote on every side

We created a little scrapbook for Gabby.  Each of us wrote her a message and Andrew's blew me away.  He wrote, "I think of you as a rock star a roll model and a nice sister.  I love you and I am sorry for all the times I been mean to you.  Your loveing your caring your everything a brother wants.  I love you."

Does it get any cuter?

They really spoiled their sister tonight and it makes me smile.  Sure, they drive each other insane at times, but they adore one another too.  I am one lucky mommy!!!

I am also the mother of a 14 year old daughter.  How in the world did that happen so quickly?  Boy does she make me proud.  I cannot be around the girl without smiling.  Usually cause she is doing or saying something silly.  She is who she is and will not change for anyone.  I admire that so much.  She is a pretty special girl.  Days like today remind me not to sweat the small stuff and to cherish every moment.  Happy birthday Gabrielle Renee!

Birthday girl!